150 Word Limit - Stealth Bastard Deluxe (PC, 2012)

Welcome to 150 Word Limit, a column where I try to write down my thoughts on and/or review something in 150 words or less. Today's subject; Stealth Bastard Deluxe, developed by Curve Studios and released on November 28th of 2012.

The inception behind Stealth Bastard Deluxe, a stealthy 2D puzzle platformer, is interesting. Jonathon Biddle, the game director, stated that he wanted this game to avoid the awkward scenarios in other stealth games where the player has to fumble their way back into the shadows after fumbling out of them. Stealth Bastard Deluxe succeeds at not having any of those segments, which it manages by making being spotted very punishing and speeding up the pace of the game. When the levels aren't focusing on puzzle elements they tend to force the player to skirt the line between being stealthy and progressing at a controlled pace, which make up the best parts of the game. However, for people who aren't up for doing some puzzles or who want a stealth game that lets them take their time, Stealth Bastard Deluxe won't satisfy them.

Steam and it's top-selling games as of 8:40pm EST on 7-15-2013

This is a single frame from Magi, episode 18

(By the way, it's kind of AWESOME.)

So, I noticed something odd about the Steam Game Hubs...

After A While: Metroid Other M, Part 3

The 3D Where's Waldo Puzzles

While there were few that I could skip talking about, they are starting to get a bit more numerous. Throughout the game the camera will go into a first-person view of Samus and the player won't be able to exit out of this view until they locate and hold their cursor over a specific object for some time. They are essentially 3D Where's Waldo puzzles, as the segment title describes. While I can kind-of see the purpose of these scenes (more drama/make the player notice something small), I don't understand why they are there, especially when the rest of the game is a straight-forward action game. I can only assume this was a decision to make the game more like a traditional Metroid title (having the player pay attention to their surroundings), but it feels dis-genuine when it's forced upon the player.

Resident Confused

Up until this point, there have been some optional rooms that force the player to don tank controls a la Resident Evil. These rooms have mostly been what appear to be bathrooms that contain some upgrades like missile packs. Now, bear in mind these rooms are small; using the normal control set would not work well in these rooms, which justifies the control switch to the point where I'm willing to bite it and move on. However, when I get to the abandoned information center in what I believe to be Sector 1, the game forces the player to use the Resident Evil-esque controls. Now, as I said before I didn't mind this in the optional areas. However, I  do have some problems with it being used in the information center. Specifically, it just slows the pace of the game to a crawl for no real reason. It's not like the game has had a focus on heavy atmosphere, especially when I was doing back-flips about 5 minutes ago. Not only that, but the information center isn't an extremely compact area. It at least took me about 3-5 minutes to get to my final destination solely because of the controls.

The War I Took No Part In

After I'm done acting like a tank, the whole party of Galactic Federation troops ends up outside the information center being attacked by some normal enemies and a particularly nasty giant lizard-thing. After Samus takes the elevator down and ends up outside, she is attack by the lizard-thing from above and ends up trapped between the claws of it. This initiates a first-person view where Samus must repel the lizard-things stinger on its tail with some good, old-fashioned missiles. While the tail whipped around a bit ridiculously, one of the soldiers comes to my rescue by firing the giant laser weapon at the lizard, repelling it off of Samus. This is where I start to think that the battle really starts; I help my comrades defeat the normal horde of enemies while I personally beat the lizard to shit. However, this is not what happens. Instead the cutscene of the soldier saving me continues and he ends up shooting the lizard-thing again finally killing it. The rest of the Galactic Federation soldiers end up dealing with the normal enemies all by themselves with no external help. Other than somewhat detracting from Samus's character by being a bit helpless, this sequence also builds the player up to drop them. It really doesn't make the game look good.

Smashing In A Brick Wall Made Of Lava

After another 3D Where's Waldo puzzle, I'm ordered by Adam to investigate a curios oddity that I had discovered earlier. A little while ago I met a baby animal of some kind. Other than feeding off of the flesh of the enemies I killed, the animal seemed to be stalking me. I actually find this plot quite well done so far since it's mostly handled visually. But anyways, I'm ordered to follow the thing and end up going to a different sector, which just so happens to be the sector with lava. Of course, everything that's there is expected; lava, lava rocks, lava/flame-themed enemies, etc. So I continue on, assuming nothing will go wrong or surprise me. And then a giant lava-serpent of sorts comes out from under the lava and breaks the pathway which I was walking on, effectively swallowing me and making me instantly get a Game Over screen. For a second I assumed that I was having some sort of fever dream and decided to do the same thing and ended up getting the same result; one broken bridge and one game over screen. Now, after reloading from a checkpoint and just standing in the hallway, I notice the same lava-serpent jumping in the background. For a second I pondered about the action, and then came to the conclusion that was my cue as to not advance. And then I realized that was completely asinine. How was I supposed to guess that I would be in an instant Game-Over-screen situation based on that? While I didn't investigate any further, it was stupid and I stopped playing right there.

After A While: Metroid Other M, Part 2

"Less Talking, More Game" Is Confirmed!

After getting past the first boss, I was finally sent on my own with my only orders being to reactivate the Bottle Ship's electrical system. This thankfully opens up the game to the point where I'm not being dragged by the toes through dialog and flashbacks. And I have to say, I'm very pleased with the gameplay! While it's not anything like past Metroid titles, the fluid and fresh mechanics appeal to me much more than those in past titles.

The Bottle Ship Has An Appropriate Name

At a specific point during my journey to turn on more of the lights, I stumbled into something interesting I though I wouldn't see on a spaceship; an oasis filled with plant life and creatures. Of course, being in space brought up the question of how this is all possible. After working my way around this oasis, I found some sort of beacon and turned it off. This caused the fake backdrops of wildlife beyond the small oasis area to disappear and reveal the metallic walls and circuitry. To be honest, this is one of the best in-game reveals of anything that doesn't use a single line of dialog; there's no build-up or character commenting on the aspect. The game throws the player in an odd situation and through what they see they start to understand why said situation is odd. It's very odd to see this in what will most-likely be a very dialog-heavy game by the end of the day.

The Cinematic Direction

Unlike almost every other Metroid game, Other M is very guided. There are some opportunities for straying from the path, but otherwise the game wants the player to follow one route and stick to it. However, due to this the game can be a bit more cinematic with how it presents locales and it's starting to show in my most recent mission. The camera positions itself in such ways that make the locals noticeably different. This results in the game being more cinematic, which is a conflicting and interesting direction to take the series at the same time. On one hand Metroid has always been about being in control of a lonely experience, something that feels hindered due to the camera being so obviously manipulated. However, it also enhances the ability to show off the environments, which are arguably some of the most important parts of the Metroid series.

Things I Want To Do This Summer

-- Stay up for a whole night of Radio Dead Air.

(INCOMPLETE)

-- Finish my entire collection of unfinished N64 games.

(INCOMPLETE)

-- Make a video game.

(INCOMPLETE)

--  Finish my "After A While: Metroid Other M" series.

(INCOMPLETE)

-- Write an opinionated editorial for 'www.digitallydownloaded.net' .
(INCOMPLETE)

 -- Lose some pounds (~20).

(INCOMPLETE)

-- Play through the Uncharted trilogy.

(INCOMPLETE)

-- Upgrade my computer so that I can play Iron Front: Liberation 1944 at a decent framerate.

(INCOMPLETE)

 -- Buy and read some more manga/comic books/graphic novels.

(INCOMPLETE)

 -- Perform some sort of gaming marathon (w/ friends).
(INCOMPLETE)

-- Get through at least half of my Steam backlog.

(INCOMPLETE)

-- Watch Terminator 2: Judgement Day and The Matrix (already have DVDs).

(INCOMPLETE)

 -- Only drink water for a day.

(INCOMPLETE)

 -- Play some sort of Dungeons-&-Dragons-esque game at least once.

(INCOMPLETE)

My CounterStrike: Global Offensive Invite

I'm Now An Official Games Journalist!

I welcome the world of late-night announcements and free video games with open arms!

Article #1: Portal 2 Level Editor To Be Released May 8th

In this article I took a straightforward approach with the knowledge that was present; have a snazzy intro paragraph, report the information that I had, talk about a personal experience relating to the news, and throw in a joke or two. I think it worked out really well, even if it took 45 minutes to write.

Article #2: Call Of Duty: Black Ops 2 is a thing

...And this is the article where I stopped giving damns. It's basically one big joke/rag post on Call Of Duty and BLOPS 2, with an almost 100% serious paragraph that failed to be that. Now, I do want to get something out of the way; I don't hate Activision or Treyarch or Infinity Ward (although Activision does need to be slapped every now-and-then), it's just that Call Of Duty is such an easy target that I HAVE to go for it. Think of it like a nerdy stand-up comedian and the mention of Twilight fans; the comedian just HAS to make fun of the ridiculous culture surrounding the poorly-written books.

After A While: Metroid Other M, Part 1

Did Metal Gear Solid 4 Have A Cousin?

Throughout my first hour of the game, I'm noticing that the half of my time is spent watching stuff happen rather than playing the game. For a series about immersion and loneliness, this is a bit jarring, especially considering that most of the cutscenes involve things that happened in the past. I can't quite immerse myself when the focus changes from "Now" to "X Days/Weeks/Years Ago".

It's True: Samus Won't Shut Up

While she doesn't talk during gameplay, Samus has at least one line of dialog in every cutscene, and considering that half of the game so far has been cutscenes, it doesn't help. Also, the English voice actor that they got to play Samus is emotionless entirely throughout her performance. And it's not the good kind of emotionless either; she literally sounds dead-bored throughout the entirety of the first hour. The other voice actors actually do their job well, so it's not like I'm sitting in front of a choir of half-bored, half-sleeping surrogates, but more like I'm sitting in a choir that contains a robotic soprano that is auto-tuned to death.

Less Explaining, More Talking

The cutscenes that were mentioned earlier are narrated by Samus as she explains things in the past as well as what's actually happening currently (in past-tense). To me, most of the narrating is extremely preachy and doesn't give any thought to the fact that Samus is still a person and less of a vehicle for the story to center around. I'm also seeing no real reason for this, as if things were held under wraps it would give a sense of mystery to the story and it's not like the currently-narrated dialog skips long, unimportant talking scenes that the player wouldn't want to sit and listen too. Also, some scenes are extended due to Samus' narration and my feelings towards those are the same as the scenes involving what happened in the past; remove them and you just presented something interesting for the player to ponder on.

Pointless Addition #1

After Samus meets the Federation troops on the Bottleship, she lets them go ahead before deciding to trail behind. However, a little message box pops up stating that since Adam hasn't authorized Samus' uses of missiles or bombs, Samus has decided to turn them off. Other than being stupid and having no build-up to the point where Samus can justify this move, the ban gets removed about 15 minutes later when the first boss of the game is encountered, a blob of purple bugs. While technically only the use of missiles are authorized, there's no point in actually using bombs during the boss battle and right after it Adam authorizes the use of bombs. And even from a gameplay perspective I don't see the logic behind the decision; the only thing that I could find that required the use of either missiles or bombs before the boss was a hidden extra energy tank. And even if missiles open doors like they did in other games, I imagine it wouldn't be hard to perma-lock those doors until after the first boss was beaten.


To Come: Samus' First Mission Under Adam (And Beyond...)

After A While: Metroid Other M, Part 0

The Prologue

While I haven't played Metroid Other M, I have heard so much about it. I've been there since the announcement of the game at Nintendo's 2009 E3 press conference and I've felt all of the bumps of the ride, from the jarring release backlash to the ever-present scalding hate that some still have of the game. I've even seen a few deconstructions of how the game just doesn't work. However, in general I'm seeing two different concerns being brought up:

CONCERN #1: Samus Talks Too Much

Ignoring my urge to post the parody videos from Youtube, it appears that Samus talks too much in this game. From pointless philosophy to "The Baby", Samus never seems to take a breather outside of gameplay. Considering that this will be the easiest aspect to notice, I'll only mention it if I find it interesting/meaningful to the game in any way.

CONCERN #2: The Story Just Doesn't Work

From abandoning previously established characters and to never confronting stupid lapses of logic, it seems that the story of Other M seems to fail as a sequel, prequel, and stand-alone narrative. The one that everybody picks on is that even though Samus has all of here powers from the get-go, she isn't allowed to traverse a lava-infested area with her heat-protection enhancement activated until Adam gives here the go-ahead. However, there have been other problems that (supposedly) negate those other small points. I'll be sure to comment on these when I see them.

The Epilogue

And so my map of this adventure has been planned along with the tour spots. Now all that's left is to push on the accelerator...

Analysis: Star Wars Kinect Dance Videos

PROLOGUE

If you're reading this blog, you're probably seen the Kinect Star Wars "I'm Han Solo" video. Below is a copy of said video, only better quality with actual screen-capture software being used;



As you saw, the video is basically Han Solo dancing to a reworked version of that one pop song by that Derulo fellow (which can be found right here). The internet has gone ablaze with hate (unsurprising by this point in it's life), basically stating that the video has ruined the entire Star Wars franchise so much that all dignity has finally been lost. Now, Star Wars has not had any dignity for years but the video still stands as insulting on every personable level of being a Star Wars fan. However, There's also another video from the same game floating around involving Darth Vader and Emperor Palpatine dancing. Below is the video;



Now, following the previous logic, fans (including myself) should be outraged by this as well. However, I'm not. I actually find the video to be hilarious and awesome at the same time. Why is that? Why am I not throwing an internet hissy-fit over more Star Wars characters doing little dance routines? From these thoughts I compiled a list of points that would justify me liking the second video while also hating the first one.

Point #1: Dub-Techno Dance >>> Pop R&B

The first thing a blind person would notice about the two videos is that the music is completely different. In the first you have a reworking of Jason Derulo's "Ridin Solo" song, which is, at best, a generic pop song. It's certainly not made by no Cee Lo Green. The song also sets up a "Hey, this is ridiculous and we want you to notice!" vibe, which doesn't help when straight from the get-go people already realize it's ridiculous and they're not laughing.

Now in the second video we have this sweet electronic song. Not only is it a song that you want to dance to, but it's expertly crafted so that ANYONE won't challenge you on wanting to dance. It also sets the tone a bit more seriously, making the fact that it's supposed to be a silly dance number all the more apparent. And after doing a bit more research, guess what the song is? It's non other than Deadmau5's "Ghosts 'n' Stuff". Yes, THAT Deadmau5, the electronic wizard who has sold out stadiums around the globe. While I'm not a fan of all of his work (especially his completely overrated "Raise Your Weapon"), he does good stuff and he clearly has an audience.

Point #2: Polar Opposites And Their Collision

In the "I'm Han Solo" video, the main attraction is Han Solo dancing. Now let's ask for a minute; would Han Solo ever dance? While he was (mostly) a badass in the films, it's not too outlandish to think that Han Solo would like to (occasionally) break a sweat on the dance floor. Yes, maybe he wouldn't be dancing like a hooligan to 2010 pop song, but imagining him performing the activity wouldn't be completely out-of-reach. Right off of the bat the entertainment value of the video is deplenished as the main attraction is partly gone.

Now look at Darth Vader dance video; would Darth Vader and Emperor Palpatine EVER face each-other in a dance-off? Hell no! They're too busy crushing the Jedi scum! Why in the name of the Deathstar would they ever face each-other in a duel of the moves? And yet here they are, taking the matter 100% seriously. The main attraction is instantly more appealing and none of it is taken away.

Point #3: The Seriousness Is Strong With This One

As hinted in the previous sections, both of these videos take themselves very differently; the first video shows that it knows it's supposed to be a funny little scene while the second one doesn't let itself fall into that trap. The slow animations, reworked lyrics, and constant smiling faces of the "I'm Han Solo" parody make it appear obvious that no one could take it all at face value and believe it's anything more than childish fun.

However, the Darth Vader dance-off video does almost the exact opposite; it has fast-paced animations, has no lyrics at all (even while the original song had lyrics), and the only face we see is Emperor Plapatine's face, which doesn't look happy at all. In a way we can take this video more seriously and a ton of good comedy comes from people stating ridiculous comments with complete seriousness. Have you ever had a friend (or yourself) say something absolutely ridiculous, only moments later realizing that they said it with a completely straight face? I can't imagine anyone not having that experience in their lifetime. This video comes that same root of comedy and it shows.

EPILOGUE

And so I have effectively proven why I like one video of Star Wars characters dancing over another. I need to get a life...

Mario And Luigi: Advent Children

Battle Pac-Royale

Digimon Season 7: NERDGASM 2 (Gasping For Air)

The Steam Negative Sale

I would buy that for $-21!

Digimon Season 7: NERDGASM 1 (No, I'm Not A Pedophile)

Digimon Season 7 Just Got Real

Shit has just gotten real.

Also, NERDGASM-UUUUUGH!!!

Some Thoughts: Minecraft

Since I've been playing vanilla Minecraft for over a year I thought I would get down my thoughts before I start modding the game and loose track of what Minecraft actually was to me.

The first purchasable build of Minecraft was released around two years ago (December 23rd, 2009). The game soon blew up into popularity and its creator, Markus "Notch" Persson, was made into a millionaire. Even after the initial rush of sales, Minecraft grew more and more popular, with many updates, fan-made videos, and even massive collaborative projects of amazing scale. Minecraft's popularity grew so much that it was able to get its own convention named "Minecon", where the game finally got out of its development process and was officially considered released.

Minecon was just ended a week-and-a-half ago. The full game has finally been released, which means that its possible to officially review Minecraft as a game and as an experience. Now, don't get those two confused; a game and an experience are different things. See games like S.T.A.L.K.E.R. and Deadly Premonition to easily observe the difference between enjoying experiences and enjoying games.

Now, back to Minecraft; as an experience, Minecraft is fantastic. It can basically be summed up as digital Legos with a survival aspect attached to it. Building castles with moats around them to defend yourself from the horde of enemies that appear at night is a satisfying experience that never loses its charm. Also making your own crazy, illogical structures out of blocks is a satisfying experience as well.

HOWEVER...

Minecraft as a game is a bit lacking.

First off, Minecraft gives no real purpose to explore beyond an established area. Yes, there are villages, but they serve no purpose other than varying the terrain. There are one-room dungeons, but they don't contain anything useful that you couldn't get from mining. There are even small dungeon biomes underground, but they are extremely rare and can only be found with a rare item that occasionally breaks when you try to use it and requires getting semi-rare items that involve a high risk of death.

Secondly, the different dimensions of Minecraft feel more like side areas rather than part of the main experience. And the dimensions aren't even good side areas, as it seems that the purpose of these locals were to try out some new world generation code. Each dimension has only one "Main Attraction", and beyond those there is no reason to stick around. You can't acquire more resources to upgrade your gear (or even make new gear) and almost all the structures that spawn in these dimensions are either decorative, boring, or both. It's even impossible to live in these vistas, considering that most food is impossible to grow and entire structures can get ruined within seconds.

To sum up my opinion of Minecraft; it's a great experience that I think everyone to play, but the game's world is lacking meaningful content that breaks me from enjoying Minecraft to its fullest. And that's my thoughts.

Some Thoughts: NightSky

To put it simply, NightSky is a ball-rolling 2D puzzle-platformer. Every stage you roll your character (a black sphere) around, maybe solve a puzzle or two, get to the right side of the third screen and move on to the next area. It's not some epic journey with all of these events and bigger set-pieces with every change of scenery. I think that's why I like it though; the game is trying to impress you by what it is, not what it's attempting to do.

Let me explain; there's a difference between impressing people by who you are and what you're trying to do. While a scientist may have discovered something that may change the world, the scientist is still a scientist who does long, complicated equations and probably spends all of his day in a sealed room. The scientist, as a person, is unimpressive. Now, look at a passionate chef that manages to juggle cooking three meals and would gladly re-make an entire dish if he thought that it wasn't up to whatever high standards a person would have; who would you rather have a chat with? While I'm sure either choice would be interesting, I feel that a majority would find the chef a more engaging person.

I believe that above analogy can be used in terms of the video game industry. Many big-budget games (and even some small-budget ones) impress you with specifically what's happening rather than what's there. While I'm sure Call of Duty is a solid game, I can't think that people play it because they're looking for some feeling or weight to the world; they're playing it because events are unfolding and kill-streaks are incoming. I also can't see any other reason why the S.T.A.L.K.E.R. game series is so popular and is considered a cult classic besides having a world that screams "I want you dead" at every minute.

Now, back to NightSky. The reason it fits in the "I'm impressing you by being what I am" category is that the whole game lacks a sense of straight-forwardness. There isn't any precursor that suggests that what happens next is what should be happening; it just happens. This is one of the reasons why Minecraft is popular; there's no coherency to the world, things are just as they are, giving that sense of an unpredictable future. NightSky follows this mentality, going from dark caves in one area to a high-above-the-clouds city of Victorian architecture. This sense of unpredictability that I had playing NightSky for the first time is what really enhanced my experience. Of course, I'm not really surprised by this since the game was made by Nifflas, a one-man team that's known for making very unique and unsuspecting games. Either way, I enjoyed this game. I guess that's the end result.